I wait eyes half closed stilling myself,
seeing all around dimly,
heart pounding and racing,
sweating, shivering.
Then the blade flashes fast,
tears down, biting
deep into loose flesh, full lips
my body all tense,
uncontrollable shivers and tremors,
another slash, the lips are gone,
a spurt, a splash
then the gush of running wet red spreads slowly,
and swells and swells, emptying me,
stunting me, marking and hurting.
The pain in my head stings, stuns and swells,
throbs banging,
pain plays discordant persistent jarring strokes,
hammering pounding,
my flesh now raw, red and ragged.
My sobs of pain and bewilderment
are drowned in the jubilant ululation of aunties
while mother looks on,
sharing my pain, not speaking,
lips trembling as I tremble, lips sealed,
recalling her own past and initiation,
an unwilling accomplice to a stubborn slow to die practice
that slashes, gores, gashes and stunts portions of life of the living
in keeping with the hollow voice of an outmoded moribund tradition.
Reflections 